After-Xmas Bargain Buy! Both 6 x 9 Paperbacks for one killer price! (So exciting! 🤓) Get both copies signed on BloodMagik.comfor a measly 24 beans! (Sale ends on 1/1/19)
Synopsis for A Christmas Carcassing: In Shawn & Marv’s Holiday Horrors (Book One), two toasted teens find themselves immersed in the festive corpses of Christmas mall workers without a clue to who’s leaving them behind. With only one Santa left alive in town, can these two leaf-brained suburbanites piece together who’s tearing the holidays apart in time to save Christmas? Comedy and carnage collide in this comedic -insert arbitrary C-word here-
Synopsis for Blood Magik: A Cold Day in Hell: Undead hockey jocks. An eight-foot-tall, soul-hording demon wolf. A near-immortal witch with sights set on ruling her New Hell on Earth. And a squad of unlucky chum in apocalyptic waters all collide under blood-clouds for a morbidly wicked adventure staring a beast, a beauty, and an old guy. Blood Magik is the sports-themed d-day no one dared asked for. Readers, be warned: This book bites.
ON SALE NOW FOR CHRISTMAS!! Plus GWP with buys over $20 on BLOODMAGIK.COM
In Shawn & Marv’s Holiday Horrors (Book One), two toasted teens find themselves immersed in the festive corpses of Christmas mall workers without a clue to who’s leaving them behind. With only one Santa left alive in town, can these two leaf-brained suburbanites piece together who’s tearing the holidays apart in time to save Christmas? Comedy and carnage collide in this season’s cantankerous cockup. GET YOURS NOW! -z/cm
Pretty sure this Santa Claus didn’t come for milk or cookies, unless you baked them in the powdered ashes of charred children and glazed them with their mother’s still-warm blood (lol…yeesh… That’s even a too dark for me…heh)
Rest assured, A Christmas Carcassing is indeed brutal, but all in good fun. “No Tiny Tim was harmed in the making of this novel.” Get your signed copy of my Christmas comedy horror novel on 12/11/18, only on Bloodmagik.com 🤘🎅⛄🔪🌲
Now why didn’t I think of a man-eating Xmas tree for the finale in my horror novel? 🤔 Regardless, THE BOOK IS NOW AVAILABLE!! Your new favorite soon-to-be cult classic Christmas horror, stoner comedy is officially funking-up the listings on Amazon with its excess of sticky greens and morbid reds! The brutaltastic tree, on the other hand, you gotta talk to @sivart6 on insta to get your hands on. For a signed copy of the novel, dm me and I’ll put you on a list. Otherwise, order yours now on Amazon 🎅⛄🚬💊🚬👹
Thought this morbid little xmas concoction was appropriate. XD
Ok, so, this sexy little sleaze of a novel is unofficially 257 pages, which bodes nicely for a self-published book to be on the thinner side (much cheaper to put into print). I just finished another run-through of it to dot my eyes and cross my peas and this shit is looking pretty fresh. I kinda did a no-no by adding something in that is definitely illegal, so I’m gonna look into getting permission to keep it (being intentionally vague, here, to not give away any of the plot twist). If I can get permission: sweeeet. If not: ain’t no thang; easily remedied. It won’t hurt the story to change it into something that legal. But while I’m looking into that I gotta track down some freelancer to format the fucker for me and get it print-ready for Christmas. I’ll probably eventually pitch it to an agent when I find one, but I don’t see why I can’t self-publish it in the meantime. So we’re one step closer tonight to getting ‘er done. I can’t wait to have a hard copy of it stinking up a shelf in my home.